Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

LSU baseball vs. UCLA game suspended on Monday night. Here's when it will resume - NOLA.com

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What happens to adults with Down syndrome when their parents can't look after them any more?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Former ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ star breaks down in tears over ALS diagnosis - PennLive.com

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Is it common for people to fall in love with someone else while still married? If so, why do they choose to stay in their marriage?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t cotton to rapists

What happened to your school bully?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Earth is Eating Itself: Vast Chunks Of Crust Are Being Swallowed From Within - The Daily Galaxy

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I can read

'Disconnected' tyre should force Spanish GP strategy variety - The Race

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I understand how hurricane paths work

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

It’s time to let Iron Galaxy make a brand new Tony Hawk game, and wipe the worst one from history - Video Games Chronicle

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Quo adipisci nostrum sunt ut ducimus quaerat sit quaerat.

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have a reading level above third grade

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

The Trump-Musk feud has been great for X, which jumped up the App Store charts - TechCrunch

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I see through liars

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

How do I build muscle easily with isometrics?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I actually pay taxes

How conservative the Japanese people really is? And the government?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for fakery

What is it like to experience sleep paralysis?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I can count

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Why do older people have a hard time using technology?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Do married men like sucking dick?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes